Back to The Weight of Belief
“Channeled conversations with my dead narcissistic mother’s spirit, my enabler father’s spirit, Jeshua ben Joseph, The Divine Feminine, my spirit guides, and my soul. Finally, the truth about WHY my mother abused me and why she was the way she was. This is where my real healing began. Yours can, too.”
I didn’t want closure. I needed truth!
I didn’t want to forgive my mean narcissistic mother. I needed to understand why she abused me!
So I asked the one person no one else could: my dead narcissistic mother’s spirit.
I asked every hard question I’d never had the chance to ask in life.
What she revealed changed everything I thought I knew about my past, myself, her, and why she chose me to abuse.
These are the conversations I never got to have.
Until now.
And you are invited to sit at the table with me.
To hear what her spirit said.
To witness what happened.
To feel what shifts.
The Conversations We Never Had: a rare channeled body of emotional alchemy, ancestral truth, and radical clarity for adult daughters of narcissistic mothers and the professionals who care for them.
“When traditional healing couldn’t reach the haunted parts of me, I stopped searching for a path. I became the map.”
What is alchemy and why does it matter here
Alchemy was once thought of as the process of turning lead into gold.
But for adult daughters of narcissistic mothers, alchemy looks different.
It’s turning emotions into clarity, silence into truth, and shame into sovereignty.
Emotional alchemy happens when the ugliest, most unbearable parts of your story become the medicine someone else needs to heal.
That’s what The Conversations We Never Had holds.
This is not about coping strategies or advice.
It’s the raw frequency of a daughter (me!) who went to the other side to ask WHY and turned every shocking answer into something sacred.
“This is an emotional and spiritual sequence designed to reshape a daughter’s understanding of her experience.”
Who it’s for
If you’re the adult daughter of a narcissistic mother, especially if she’s passed or is dead to you, this was made for you.
Not the coping version of you. Not the well-read, well-informed version of you.
But the version who still wakes up wondering, Why did she hurt me so much? Why was it always me? Why did she twist everything I said? Why did she enjoy watching me fall apart?
The Convos exists for that daughter.
The one who’s done or is currently doing the therapy, read the books, tried to forget, tried to rise above, but still hasn’t found peace.
Because peace doesn’t come from pretending it wasn’t that bad (I know—I pretended for 53 long years!).
It comes from finally hearing the hard truths and the answers to the hard questions.
This is also for spiritually attuned therapists, coaches, and healing professionals who support women like us.
You’ll witness the rare internal world of a narcissistic mother from the other side.
You’ll learn how spirit defines narcissism, how spirit says to begin the healing process, how Jeshua explains the forgiveness process, and so much more!
You’ll feel the ripple effects of her wounds, her confessions, her energetic control.
You’ll see what happens when a daughter asks the hard questions no one dared to ask and actually gets the real answers.
No fluff. No bullshit. No theories. Just raw, sometimes painful truth.
“You don’t need another tip, another video, or another book. You need truth. And if your narcissistic mother is dead, or dead to you, The Convos might be the closest thing to understanding and closure you’ll ever find.”
Why I created it
I didn’t set out to create a product.
I was trying to survive the confusing grief of a mother I couldn’t mourn.
Because when the narcissistic mother is gone, it doesn’t end. The bad stuff twists deeper, haunts, echoes, hurts. It sucks!
That’s when all the questions I was never allowed to ask started screaming.
I had so many questions—hard questions!
Why was I her target? Why did she enjoy breaking me? Why was my sibling spared? Why didn’t my father stop her? What was wrong with her?
Therapy helped me survive and feel validated, but it couldn’t give me the real answers I craved.
So I did what no one else I knew had done.
I found a professional psychic medium.
I entered a six-month, $10,000 contract.
And I asked my mean narcissistic mother’s spirit the hard questions that had been living inside me.
Then I asked my enabler father’s spirit.
Then I asked Jeshua ben Joseph.
Then I asked The Divine Feminine.
Then I asked my spirit guides.
Then I asked my own soul.
What I received wasn’t theory. It was clarity!
It was truth that deeply changed me and gave me hope for my future.
I softened in places I thought were permanently armored (and even in places I didn’t realize I’d armored).
I found exhale where there used to be bracing and flinching.
And for the first time in 50+ years, my story made sense.
I feel so much better!
The Convos were created because I finally understood something sacred and I couldn’t bear to keep it to myself.
And now, I’m offering it to you.
“Therapy helped me survive and feel validated. But it couldn’t give me the real answers I craved. The real answers about why my mother abused me and why she was the way she was.”
Why it exists
Because some daughters don’t get safe mothers.
We get a psychological war zone disguised as a family.
And when those mothers die or are gone by no-contact, the wreckage and fallout remain.
The Conversations We Never Had exists because traditional healing couldn’t reach the places I was still stuck.
It exists because no book or therapist ever looked me in the eye and said, “Here’s the truth about your mother’s darkness—why she abused you, why she targeted you, and why she pretended it was love.”
This is for the daughter still carrying questions like poison in her bloodstream.
This work exists:
to give voice to the silenced daughter
to answer the questions that were never safe to speak aloud
to unhook survivors from inherited shame and survival roles
to expose what maternal narcissistic abuse really looks like from the other side of death
to offer a soul-level alternative when therapy doesn’t go deep enough
to show that the deepest healing sometimes begins after the narcissist is gone
to remove the survival identity and explore the you that was never allowed to exist
to bring radical clarity when closure is impossible and logic can’t explain the abuse and its damage
to alchemize my pain into something that helps you heal faster, self-reconstruct on your terms, and feel real hope for your future.
This isn’t about rehashing the pain.
It’s about finally being free.
“I sat down two years after she died and faced the negative force that had dominated my life. No more gaslighting. No more screaming. No more narrative twisting. She couldn’t control the conversation anymore.”
The six voices that changed everything
Session 1: my narcissistic mother’s spirit
This first channeling session happened almost two years after she died. I didn’t know what to expect, only that my body was on high alert and my heart felt like it might explode in the days leading up to this session. Was she still angry that I’d…
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gone no contact during the last six months of her life? Did she even realize I had? I worried she’d be cold, cruel, or punishing, maybe even abusing my father on the other side. He showed up, too, and what I witnessed between them surprised me.
She didn’t wait for questions. She jumped in immediately and her first sentence made me whisper, “What the fuck?!” Then she did something I never expected: she explained herself. Without being asked.
And what came next shocked me even more. She told me how she saw me—how she had always seen me—and it really hurt.
She talked about her addiction. Her death. Her karmic review. But even as the words poured out, I didn’t know if I could trust her. And neither did my inner child.
Session 2: my narcissistic mother’s spirit
Twenty days after the first session, I returned to the channeling space while still reeling from session 1 because I was still unsure if I could believe what I’d heard. This second session? It was harder. My dad’s spirit came through first and said something about my mother that…
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turned my entire view of their relationship upside down.
And then she appeared. Her very first words were unnervingly… gentle. How do you trust softness from the woman who abused you?
What she said next made my inner child whimper. I sobbed. I raged internally. I spiraled somewhere between resentment and deep longing.
When I asked how she sees me now that she’s on the other side, she answered with something that made me question everything I thought I knew about who I was as a child.
Her rage had a cycle. Her cruelty had a cause. And the trauma she’d buried explained more than I was ready to hear.
Even my spirit guides stepped in to confirm she was a narcissist (they called it the physical-world label) and what the spiritual aspect knows instead. By the end of this session, I was sobbing and felt unbearably raw.
Session 3: my narcissistic mother’s spirit
Fourteen days after our previous session, I returned more grounded, more confident, certain I already knew what to expect. I didn’t. Not even close. She revealed truths I never imagined she’d say out loud…
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about the chaos she carried, the pain she caused, the epiphany that hit her like a bolt of lightning just before she died.
I asked hard questions. She answered with gut-wrenching honesty. Her spirit took me back into the emotional terrain of my childhood, into the moments I still flinch to remember, and into a final experience with her when I was 53 that was as terrifying as it was surreal.
Higher guidance stepped in, too, offering a surprising reframe of what narcissism really is and why my mother unraveled the way she did.
Nothing about this session was expected. And by the end of it, nothing in me was the same.
Session 4: my enabler father’s spirit
He died six months after my mother. And in this session, he finally got to speak after being shut down daily. I’d spent so much time focused on her and on the wreckage she caused that I hadn’t fully acknowledged the other person who shaped my childhood in silence: my dad. I had so many unspoken questions. Why didn’t he…
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stop her? Why did he look the other way? Did he even see what she was doing to me?
I was bracing for excuses. But what I got was something else.
He spoke softly. Tenderly. He explained why he’d gone quiet and why he’d disappeared emotionally instead of rising in defense.
He wasn’t defending what happened nor was he justifying it. He was letting me into his mind and telling me why he was an enabler.
He told me what it felt like to live beside her and what it cost him. And for the first time in my life, I saw what he really endured.
He wasn’t a protector. But he wasn’t a monster, either. He was a man doing what I had done, too—trying to survive her.
Session 5: Jeshua ben Joseph
I initially wasn’t sure if channeling someone like Jeshua ben Joseph—the original Aramaic name for Jesus (pronounced Yeshua)—was possible. I just knew I needed divine-wisdom clarity and talking to Jeshua felt so natural a choice. It turned out to be a very deep, moving experience. What I received felt like spiritual electricity. Jeshua didn’t give me fluffy answers or religious teachings. He gave me...
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truth. I needed to understand forgiveness. I needed someone who could hold the weight of what I’d lived through as the daughter of a narcissistic mother and show me how to keep walking forward.
He spoke of compassion, self-love, purpose, karma, and said things that upended what I’d been taught about healing, putting yourself first, and self love.
Then he looked directly at my life and named what I was doing—why I was telling this story—and called it brave (it still brings tears to my eyes). It was the most sacred validation I’ve ever felt.
And just to be clear: this session has nothing to do with religion. But it might change everything you thought you knew about love.
This session is a must read.
Session 6: The Divine Feminine
This session felt different. Sacred and soft. Like I was being invited into something ancient and knowing, but also deeply personal. I heard truths about emotional polarity, about emotional neutrality, about the karmic patterns I was here to end. And when I asked how to…
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reclaim the self I lost in my mother’s chaos—the self who used to feel freedom and joy—their answer surprised me.
They talked about my constant need to look like I’m busy, which was part of my survival story. They also told me about the frequency we are not supposed to constantly live at.
They told me I was being called to share with the collective the catalyst for my healing journey (you’ll read about it here)
And then they said something I’ll never forget: they were proud of me. Because the version of me from five years ago wouldn’t have had the capacity to write my story, to speak these truths, to walk this path. But I do now. And this session reminded me why.
Session 7: my mother’s spirit & Jeshua
I asked Demi to channel my mother’s spirit and Jeshua together without fully understanding why. I only knew I needed it. Maybe I needed to feel that a love as unconditional as Jeshua’s could…
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sit beside someone who had caused such deep harm in the people she was supposed to love the most.
My mother spoke first, opening with something I never expected while Jeshua nodded in agreement beside her.
I was surprised to learn we had endured this kind of difficult relationship before across multiple lifetimes. And even more surprised to realize I had broken our karmic cycle.
Jeshua gently reminded me that the traits I’d always tried to hide—love, tenderness, forgiveness, compassion—were not flaws. They are my original gifts.
And together, they showed me a truth I hadn’t considered: that healing doesn’t have to take years. That some karmic cycles end the moment we finally remember who we are. And when we do, transformation doesn’t have to be slow—it can be sudden, sacred, and lasting.
Session 8: my spirit guides
I thought I was just asking for direction about my future, but this session became something far greater. My spirit guides didn’t offer a step-by-step plan. They offered…
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a mirror.
When I hesitated to name what I wanted, they didn’t push, they reflected it back to me with surprising clarity.
What followed was a collapse of the old beliefs that told me joy had to be earned and that dreaming big was dangerous.
They told me Earth is a playground. That there’s no final destination here. You’re allowed to want what you want.
They spoke of karmic soul partnership, of how much identity shifting I’ve already done, and how some pieces are still settling into place—not because I’m doing anything wrong, but because my human body and my energetic capacity are still catching up to what it is I’m creating.
And they asked me to write about what it feels like to forgive the person who hurt you the most? Not the performance of forgiveness, but the real thing. So I did.
I came to this session expecting insight. What I got was momentum. and a peek into the blueprint of what could be my future.
Session 9: my soul
This was the final session. The one where I finally heard the voice I hadn’t yet fully met: my own soul. I entered curious about my pre-birth plan, wondering if the brutality of my childhood had been…
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chosen prior to birth at the soul level.
What I didn’t expect was the revelation about my second abuser. A mirror of her volatility. A weapon that shaped my nervous system and stole my sense of security and safety. You’ll actually witness my revelation and have a front row seat as I break it down in order to alchemize it.
This wasn’t just about additional trauma. It was about soul level reconfiguration. Identity reclamation. The sacred unlearning of everything I’d been taught to believe about self worth and enough-ness.
My soul showed me that I had never been forgotten. That I was the one I’d been waiting for. That remembrance is how the blueprint begins to rewrite itself.
This wasn’t just the end of the series. It was the beginning of everything.
“I didn’t just ask all the hard questions. I demanded truths! And across the veil, I received them. ALL OF THEM.”
What you’ll receive
You’re not getting advice or coping strategies because I’m not a therapist.
You’re getting something far rarer.
These aren’t summaries or polished chapters in a memoir.
They’re the spirit-level transmissions that rewrote my life and gave me hope for the future.
Each of the nine channeling sessions is 45–60 minutes long, fully transcribed by me and organized so you can move through them at your own pace.
What you’ll receive is both sacred and grounded:
9 full-length, word-for-word channeling sessions
With my mother’s spirit (3 sessions), my father’s spirit, Jeshua ben Joseph, a combined session with Jeshua and my mother’s spirit, The Divine Feminine, my spirit guides, and my soul.
My raw reflections, commentary, and processing are woven throughout
Not cleaned up or edited for comfort. Just the real-time truth of what happened and what helped me heal and self-reconstruct.
Every word spoken by spirit, transcribed word-for-word by me
No summaries no filters, no fluff.
Lifetime access to the entire collection
These sessions will land differently depending on where you are in your healing. That’s why access doesn’t expire—some truths take time to open.
The Year the Truth Spoke Softly, Then Screamed!
A three-part narrative that covers the 12 months prior to The Conversations We Never Had. It begins in August 2020, when I moved into my parents’ home as a caregiver, unaware I was entering the belly of the beast and unaware at the time my mother was a narcissist. Spirit said,“You’re going to learn why you are the way you are.” It ends with my mother’s death. This is the storm before The Convos.
Why I Needed More Than Therapy
Six short pieces that answer why therapy, though helpful, wasn’t enough for me. These pieces explore the deeper hunger beneath the coping and beyond the clinical, how the channeling sessions worked, what it really felt like to face my mother’s spirit and keep showing up anyway, and more.
This is not a story designed to inspire or feel-good content you scroll through and forget.
It’s clarity, my painful awakening, and the deeper healing that lives off the beaten path.
The Convos doesn’t follow a path. It creates one.
This is something you return to as you grow and evolve.
“Finally, my pain and life experience had context. My confusion had shape. My story started to make sense. That’s what The Convos offers. Not an ending. A beginning you’ve never been given.”
What makes this different
This isn’t a self-help book.
It’s not a framework, not another list of symptoms, not a coach telling you how to rise.
This is a sacred body of rare channeled truth straight from the spirits I needed most to hear from.
The woman who abused me until I finally woke up at age 53.
The father who enabled her.
The divine guides who showed me the deeper story.
And the soul who lived it: mine.
You won’t find this anywhere else.
These are not summaries nor are they filtered through a therapist’s lens. They are verbatim transcripts of what was spoken by spirit through the veil.
This is what happens when a daughter dares to ask the unaskable—and spirit answers.
This isn’t a promise that healing will be easy (honestly, it was agonizing for me). It’s proof that healing is possible when you let the truth in.
“I firmly believed insight from the other side would be the missing link to my healing—and it turns out I was right.”
Price and access
$1,497
Immediate, lifetime access.
Transcripts only (no video or audio because no one wants to watch me sob or lose my cool during a channeling session, LOL).
No refunds. No sampling.
I paid over $10,000 to channel these sessions during a six-month contract with a professional psychic medium.
You receive them all—every word, every raw reflection, every spirit-delivered truth + my reflections and healing moments woven throughout—for much less than that.
This is not entertainment. This is soul work.
For the daughter carrying questions no one has ever answered, for the daughter aching to understand what happened and why, for the daughter who feels alone in her grief, confusion, and rage.
And for the therapists and professionals who support women like me.
The Conversations We Never Had may be exactly what you’ve been waiting for.
Behind the scenes gallery of my channeling sessions
