Channeling session with Jeshua ben Joseph

August 2023 session transcript

Demi began our channeling session this morning by thanking me for asking her to channel Jeshua. She said her entire body was vibrating with energy and she was feeling excited. My own excitement had been building for days leading up to this session.

“I’ve been dropping into this energy and first of all, I want to thank you for asking me about channeling Jeshua. It’s so funny—yesterday I was focused on honoring this sacred energy with ritual, but the guides just laughed at me because while it is a sacred energy and we do want to hold the sacredness of it, it’s an energy that is so present for all of us at any given time. This is one of the main messages coming through right now.

“We don’t need to be any certain way to receive the love of this energy and to receive its guidance and wisdom. We just get to show up in our imperfections and in who we are to receive the loving guidance of what is present.

“I feel like the energy is wanting to come right through. I’ve been connecting with this energy for about 15 minutes before we got on this call. It feels very present and I can feel it in my body,” Demi said.

And then without hesitation…

“And, so we begin,” Jeshua said.

“There is a part of us beyond the chatter of the mind that knows stillness and it is this part of us that is the embodiment of our own Christlike nature.

“The stillness has all the answers we need.

“The stillness is the place most strived to get to, yet understand that the striving is the thing that pushes it away.

“The stillness is the witness to the chattering mind. The chattering mind is always present, just like the stillness is always present.

“The stillness is in the breath, yet it is in the moment. 

“There is nothing to be or do or have; it just is.

“The stillness is the witness to the chattering mind. The chattering mind is always present, just as the stillness is always present.

“But it is in the ability to have awareness of both to not deem one better than the other, but to realize that they both just are.

“The same with the dark and the light, the busy and the being, the good and the bad, the angelic and the evil. They are not opposites, but all aspects of the wholeness.”

“And so for Carole, the following words are coming through for you,” Demi said.

“There is stillness, yet there is pressure. And it is in your belief that there should be no pressure that it is taking you away from the stillness. The pressure is here to challenge you into the deeper knowings you already have.”

I was in awe. Jeshua knew about my resistance to pressure. He spoke directly to something I’d been quietly wrestling with. Lately, I’d been telling myself that things shouldn’t feel hard anymore now that my mom was no longer on this earth. The tension, the strain—I thought all of it should’ve died with her. I had endured enough pressure to last a lifetime.

But Jeshua reframed everything. The pressure wasn’t here to punish me. It was here to challenge me into the deeper knowings I already have.

“The pressure is the reflection point. This is not something for you to hold in your body, this is not something for you to take on and process more deeply. This is for you to look at with awareness and it’s also for you to bring forward compassion more for YOU than for anybody else.”

Jeshua is telling me that pressure isn’t the problem. It’s the doorway! Now I’m really intrigued!

I’m a deep processor. I hold things far too deeply in my body. But hearing that the pressure is simply a reflection point—something to acknowledge, not to carry—felt like a wave of permission.

“You spend a lot of time creating compassion for others, yet you’ve not really given yourself the compassion that you have been striving to feel and find for others.

“The compassion for self is first of all what takes you deeper into your ability to unconditionally love and in your ability to unconditionally love you, first and foremost. It ripples to the other areas of your life that you are seeking healing through.”

Honestly, I was stunned. Jeshua said it was okay to love myself unconditionally. That it was okay to have compassion for myself first. Not in a “bubble bath and positive affirmations” way.

He’s talking about real, radical, internal love. Unconditional love for myself—the kind I had always been taught to fear and avoid.

After a lifetime of being groomed to always put my mother first, after years of being taught in the churches I went to that self-love was selfish—the message was always: serve others, die to self, be small, be last, put everyone else first.

And, so I did. All.the.time.

This wasn’t just spiritual advice—it flipped everything I thought I knew! It was a new blueprint for living. A new way to be.

“So you had asked earlier about what the color and energy are like when I channel Jeshua. The color that is presented to me is a light cyan blue and it’s very much this energy that presents as the bright white light, but also with tones and hues of blue weaving through. Almost that of the robe of Mother Mary, if you were to see the robe of Mother Mary it carries this lighter blue essence.” Demi said.

Jeshua continued where Demi left off, “The white tends to be the masculine energy force and the blue being that feminine energy force that gets to weave through that as well. Because again, one is not without the other.

“This is truly a time of union. In human form, I understood not only the embodiment of divine masculine, but the truth of divine masculine is understanding its feminine qualities, as well. This is the embodiment of union and this is the possibility of what gets to come through.

“The way that I healed bodies, the way that I was able to manifest at the blink of an eye, the way I was able to feed thousands upon thousands is because I understood the true union of not only masculine and feminine, but of spirit and the human form. 

“And in this union of the spirit and the human form, it is not without ego and it is not without personality and it is not without being able to feel and experience emotional states. But it is with the understanding that I am not defined by any. And this is truly what we are all called to do right now in stories such as yours that you are telling so bravely.”

He called me brave and he knows I’m telling my story. He truly sees me!

This is the most ultimate form of validation I’ve ever experienced!

For someone like me—who was punished for showing emotion, shamed for expressing pain, and conditioned to believe that silence was safer than feeling—this moment with Jeshua was very eye opening. Feeling emotional states and experiencing them were never the same thing in my life. I had felt emotion, but I had not allowed myself to experience it. Not fully or safely.

My mother used my emotions as fuel for punishment. If I cried, she attacked. If I was joyful, she shamed it. If I was anxious, she mocked me. Somewhere along the way, I learned that safety meant emptiness. So I became a shell—just enough to survive, never enough to feel.

And that detachment bled into everything.

I became an adult who punished herself for joy. Who scolded herself for enjoying food. Who couldn’t hold her own beauty without shame. After fun experiences, I’d come home and punish myself—subtly or aggressively just to neutralize the happiness and the pain it brought. It felt dangerous to feel good, so I never let myself stay there long.

And at night, the ruminating would begin.

I’d lie in bed for hours replaying her insults. Rehearsing her cruelty. Whispering her abuse into myself like bedtime prayers. I didn’t realize I was forming powerful negative affirmations, branding them into my identity while the rest of the world slept. They became my truth because I repeated them so often.

But that quiet, midnight brutality was one of the first things I became aware of in my early stages of healing. It screamed louder than anything else. And that awareness led to more.

And now—here I am chatting with Jeshua. I’m chatting with JESHUA! Who even am I right now, LOL!

“Your story is telling both the darker pieces, the tougher pieces that so many in this lifetime and the generations before have experienced, yet it also gives the light aspect and offers a midpoint for people to land in. This generation, this time in history, is all about us learning that midpoint. Re-learning the midpoint. Christ was the true embodiment of that midpoint.”

Demi’s eyes remained closed while she was quiet for a few moments, then Jeshua continued through her.

“I am worshipped in ways that were never intended. It is not ME, but it is, you [the collective]. It is not ME who is meant to be looked upon, but it is you [the collective] that is meant to be looked upon. It is the truth in understanding how valuable, how deeply honored each soul that walks this Earth is. All who walk are ME and I am all who walk.  

“The crucifixion has been completely rewritten in a way that was not intended. The crucifixion was, again, a testament of, ‘we all live.’ We all live on. There is no truth in death; only a transference. And just as I have come back again and again and again and again, so do you and so do each of us. The embodiment of ego that we come into is but a reflection bringing us back to the whole.”

“I’m really feeling a pause in the energy right now to invite you in to ask questions that may be present on either what has been channeled through or you have in the now,” Demi said.

Tears streamed down my face like a waterfall. This is such a surreal experience!

I wanted so badly to ask Jeshua a thoughtful question about what he had just said, but I couldn’t because I was completely overcome by the power of his words, the peace in his energy, and the overwhelming realization that this sacred voice was speaking directly to ME.

I reached for my notepad. I did have questions prepared and I knew which one needed to come first.

“Jeshua, I know how important forgiveness is…,“ I began, but I couldn’t finish because his energy was so intense.

His presence flowed through me like light and truth and memory and compassion all at once.

I was caught under the sublime weight of it.

More tears came.

I sat in silence for a moment, allowing the magnitude of it all to settle.

Then I tried again.

“…it’s really hard to forgive a mother like mine.” I said while choking through tears that weren't finished. “So what I would love to know is if Jeshua can just please share about forgiveness in a manner what would deeply touch people like me. The initial thought of forgiveness toward someone who was supposed to love you unconditionally and who stripped you of your power is very hard. Two years ago I could not have thought about forgiveness of my mother, but Jeshua’s channelings have changed me completely.”

“When it comes to forgiveness, it begins with you. It begins with you for the thoughts and feelings and emotions you may have toward a person who has harmed you. And it begins with allowing the unconditional love to first start with you,” Jeshua said.

Forgiveness beginning with me instead of my mom initially felt inappropriate because my mom is the one who abused me. Why should I forgive myself first when her actions toward me were atrocious?

But, Jeshua’s words landed somewhere deeper than logic. He wasn’t blaming me. He was inviting me to release myself from the prison of self-condemnation, starting with my own inner landscape.

“When you can begin to unconditionally love yourself and know that you are perfect and know that no person on the earth has the power over you that they have seemingly stripped away—this feels very real in the human experience. The first call to action is to come back to you. The first call to action is to lean into this energy of Jeshua, of your belief system, of whatever creates solace for you, and begin to pull back your own power. Begin to forgive yourself first and foremost.

“It is in the forgiveness of self for our own behavior and for our own disgruntled spaces of being for the ways that we’ve let life pass us by while living in anger and while living in despair, that we can then begin to consider forgiving another.

“The biggest challenge for many who have walked the path as you is to not feel despair for the ways they have felt. To not feel despair for the ways they have felt. For the depression, for the anger, for the frustration. It’s easy to get wrapped up in those [feelings] and to say that, ‘I should not feel those feelings.’

“But that’s not the truth. The whole experience of human form is to feel and while there have been many aspects where the feelings have been more intense than intended, it’s easy for the ego form to attach to those and to create more stories that keep from separation of self. So, forgiveness begins with you.

“I’ve been able to impact the world the way that I have because I understood that it was always me first. And, coming from relationships with those labeled narcissistic in the society, considering the idea of putting oneself first may bring up feelings contrary to what one is striving for. Meaning, it may seem like you’re putting yourself in that narcissistic state of being by putting yourself first.

“However, the difference is you understanding the connection to love. When you understand the connection of love and you put yourself first and you make your connection a priority, the connection then speaks through you to be able to forgive. 

“Most people are looking to forgive from that abused experience, the part [of them] that experienced the abuse. But forgiveness comes when you put yourself first in the connection of love and then it’s just a natural part of who you are.”

“I feel like there is something that wants to come through. I’m just anchoring deeper into this message and anchoring deeper into what is present here. So just give me a moment,” Demi said.

“At most, there will be two generations that work through this level of pain and strife, pride, prejudice. All of this that’s happening in the world right now is bubbling to the surface, is coming forward for us to look at fully is because the souls here now are brave enough to move through it.

“Those in the collective who are doing the work, those who are really aligning themselves and realigning themselves with the truth that goes beyond what is taught in sermon, but what is felt in the reflection of  each during their own sacred time. At most, two generations are needed to process out the pain fully.

“There’s a lot of people who are considering what the generations will look like based on power, control, and greed, but these are the energies that are being cleansed from the collective right now. It is so important for the collective to continue to turn back to love, to not pay attention to what is being flashed on the TV and what is being flashed and spoke about in these circles that speaks to anything but growth and love. The more we can speak of healing, of love, of forgiveness, of compassion, the more this radiates out into the generations that come. 

“And so feeling these pieces of wholeness first and foremost within oneself is what then offers the shift in the frequency because the way that frequency works to push out something such as forgiveness or compassion without filling the battery of self first loses its potency as it ripples out into the world. 

“But, as one feels this depth of compassion, of love, of forgiveness, of wholeness, of connectivity—when one’s battery is truly full and is recharged day by day by day—the compassion that is rippled from that experience is one that changes the collective. Because you understand that your thoughts create a change in the energetic field. You understand that your emotional imprint creates change in the energetic field. 

“And yes, one thought is powerful. However, the consistency held inside of the thoughts of, “I love myself,” “I forgive myself,” “I hold compassion for myself,” this thought being held consistently and truthfully through every aspect of the body holds a radiant power that shifts the generation.

“The true test right now, the true work right now, is to get all of the batteries charged back to their fullness, to their truth of love, of compassion, of radiance, of joy. And this doesn’t mean that other feelings or emotions don’t meet oneself. It simply means that when they do, you can look at them as a teacher and as a guide, not as who you are.”

And that’s when I realized I’ve never had a fully charged battery.

Not as a child. Not as a teenager. Not even in my 30s. I was always giving from a depleted place, trying to prove I was worthy of love while being slowly hollowed out.

“Jeshua, how should I describe you? The thought of people criticizing me or not believing I had a channeled conversation with you crossed my mind several times. As have the thoughts of this conversation with you offending those who are very religious,. The last thing I want to do is offend anyone.”

“Any deniance of me takes you farther away from you. And, yes, there are going to be people who don’t understand, but those are not the ones you are speaking to.

“You are free to call me whatever resonates with you more deeply. When you are connected to the light of your highest self, that is but an iteration of me. When you are connected to your joy, when you are connected to your knowing, that is me. There are many definitions for who I am, but the truth of who I am—there is only one truth of who I am.

“And this is a time for you to not seek that answer from outside of you, but for you to understand the way that I communicate with you most deeply. The feeling that you have in your body when you hear my words and you feel my presence, these are the aspects of me that you are meant to communicate.

“You may call me what you will, it is you understanding the frequency in your body that I hold and to not be ashamed that you have access to that.” Jeshua explained.

“Like a sensation in my body?” I asked.

“I definitely feel that there is an aspect—[Demi moved her camera down a little bit and placed her right hand in the middle of her torso]— there’s an aspect when I’m speaking with you and I’m channeling this in, especially this last part, there’s a feeling right here in the midpoint of your body. It’s like inside and up under the rib cage a little bit; right there in the centerpoint of the body. Do you know what I’m speaking about?” Demi asked.

“Yes,” I replied.

I was excited to hear validation of the intense sensations I experience when Jeshua is near. The first time it happened was while I was reading The Jeshua Channelings by Pamela Kribbe. Jeshua’s frequency and presence fill my heart space with the most intense energy and powerful feelings of peace, joy, and kindness. It instantly brings a rush of burning tears to my eyes. It’s such a profound and warming experience every single time.

“That is the depth of Jeshua. That is the feeling to connect to,” Demi said.

“Jeshua, can you please talk a bit about my karma and my mother’s karma?”

“You are living it. From the spirit perspective, this 100 years that have passed through the last century is but a blink of the eye from the spirit perspective and there are a lot of rapidly moving parts that are taking place as you are moving through the healing. 

“Those younger years leading up to about your mid 30s to your 40s are about the time you began to have almost a deeper awakening. There may have been some dark night of the soul.”

I confirm this timeframe’s dark night of the soul.

I remembered when my husband and I were losing everything during the recession—our home, our vehicles, nearly our marriage. I remember the dark, desperate nights when I felt like God had abandoned me. When I denounced God entirely. It all happened right in that window of time Jeshua described.

“There may have been some things happening there that really took you into those darker aspects of self.  But, it’s typically those places for your generation that begin the turning point into this more fast paced energy, into the healing of the collective.

“It’s really interesting because it seems almost as if through the younger years our energy and our movement inside of this experience goes reallllly slow as we are learning things, we are gathering information, and we are moving through. This was very much the experience with you and mom where it felt very slow and it felt like you’re trudging in the trenches.”

Trudging in the trenches. That was exactly how it felt!

“Then as this turning point takes place, and we do have several turning points that kind of amplify us into greater awareness and into that more quantum speed of healing—when it comes to the karma of you and your mother, it played out exactly how it was meant to.”

I immediately thought back to the moment before my husband and I moved to Florida to be caregivers for my parents during the covid pandemic—the moment I heard the words while packing boxes: “You will understand why you are the way you are.” It felt profound at the time, but now sitting in Jeshua’s presence I understand just how true those words were and how effective that turning point was.

“Which, from the perspective of the human and from the perspective of your reader is going to be something that is very hard to hear. And a lot of people are not ready to hear that yet because they’re feeling really in that victimized state still versus the awareness state of observation.

“It’s important for you to know that your telling of your story may bring up some anger in people. It is not your job to manage that emotion. Your job is to speak the truth and to let whatever reactions happen inside of some people happen because these actions are catalysts to their own awakening and healing.

“Look at the ways your own anger toward your mother has been a catalyst for you. This is an aspect for you to look at. Anger is not a bad emotion. Anger drives us deeper into the truth of our desires. So, Carole, do not be afraid to anger people because this is a gift to them as it leads them into their own awakening and healing.

“When it comes to the karma of you and mom, it’s important for you to understand that you already have all of the information. Sometimes, the ego, the human can desire a more complex answer than what is. The simplicity of the karma is that her inability to be connected to Source [God] and love has helped you find deeper connection. Your deeper connection is here to speak to those who do not have connection or who are seeking connection or who are seeking deeper connection or deeper meaning. That is the simplicity of the karma.”

This is a lot to take in. It’s not just about karma.

He’s saying that my mother’s inability to connect to Source (God) is what fueled my deeper connection and that this connection is meant to help others find theirs.

It’s a profound concept. But it also feels massive, weighty, sacred, and overwhelming all at the same time.

He isn’t just talking about karma. He’s suggesting that my story is a tool for the collective.

“Why me, Jeshua? Why is my story going to have such an impact on the collective? Why me?” I genuinely asked.

“Why not you?” Jeshua replied.

Of course he’d say that.

“I knew you’d say that,” I said while chuckling lightheartedly.

“It’s really important for you to understand that whether your story impacts one or it impacts a million, it impacts the collective. It will be very successful, of course, yet not pressuring yourself to make it successful is what will make it successful. You showing up and sharing the truth—these are the things that will make it successful,” Jeshua said.

This isn’t about saving the world or about achieving a metric. It is about telling the truth and trusting that the truth itself could be the medicine.

I glanced at the clock and noticed our channeling session was coming to an end. I had time for one last question. I decided to ask Jeshua what he knew about me to be true since I was on a journey to find my true self after my mom beat my free-spiritedness out of me.

“What do you want me to know most about myself, Jeshua?”

“OK, this is the part where I’m going to lose it and cry,” Demi said.

She choked up as she began to channel Jeshua’s answer.

“That you are beautiful. That if you can see you the way I see you, you would never question a thing. Your beauty and your strength and your resilience and the way you show up for others. I only wish you would show up for yourself with the same enthusiasm every single day.

“You are beyond precious and beyond supported. And even in those moments that you felt like nobody was with you, I was with you. And I never would’ve let anything happen to you that took you beyond the remembrance of who you truly are.

“All of those times you questioned your safety and your security, I was with you and I will continue to be with you. There is nothing to fear. No projections or rejections will take you back to the darkness that you once felt. The darkest days of your life are over and are far away from you now. And it is safe to step fully into the truth and into the light.”

“Thank you so much, Jeshua,” I whispered.

Demi and I both wiped away tears.

**********

Demi and I stayed on the call for a few minutes afterward. It had been a very, very moving experience for both of us.

“It’s in the perpetuation of our anger – it’s ok to feel angry – it’s in the perpetuation of these emotions that we create more separation from Source. It’s really important to begin to understand how to identify what we are experiencing emotionally, but not identify WITH the emotions we are experiencing,” Demi said.

I confirmed what she said. “The extremely hard and challenging emotions I felt in the early days, weeks, and months of my awareness of the abuse were indeed the catalyst for my awakening. I felt really intense, dark emotions at one point, especially in acknowledging I was her target.”

“So, it’s not, ‘I am angry.’  Rather, it’s, ‘I feel angry.’ It’s two completely different energies because you are the wholeness. You are love that is experiencing a moment of anger, of disconnection, of fear in a moment in time,” Demi said.

Her example helped me understand.

“With all that was said and the fact I was able to walk into my awakening and be on this lighter side with my dark days far behind me, why wasn’t my mother capable of doing that, too?” I asked.

“Because it wasn’t her path to experience that. Some people are meant to experience life that way and they come here knowing they will experience life that way as a catalyst for others and as a catalyst for the growth of others,” Demi said.

“My…mom…was…my…catalyst…for…my…awakening…” I said slowly. I was tiptoeing into a pivotal and very important, astonishing connection.

That meant my mother was here on Earth to be the catalyst for me—MY awakening, MY return to love, MY return to Source (God).

This hits me deep. Really deep!

And it opened the door even wider to forgiveness of myself for the anger and other negative emotions I had felt and identified with for pretty much my entire life.

It also strengthened my experience of forgiving my mom.

“Yes, and she was also a catalyst for the collective.”

“Which in turn means people who are three steps behind me in the process of being…” I said.

“…initiated.” Demi finished my sentence.

And, there it was.

“Ohhhhh, initiated! So does it mean that the people who read my story are meant to read it because they are meant to use their own experience by the hands of their own abusive mother or the other narc in their life as a catalyst into their own awakening and healing?”

“Yes, into a deeper state of love. A deeper state of love.”

I was struck by how significant, important, and supportive my story—my pain—my mother… it’s all part of something bigger and sacred. Something meant to change lives.

And now I know why it had to be me…